Sex-Party Etiquette Is Useful for Every Kind of Sex

Nearly every best practice used at a sex party is applicable to anyone's sexual life. At the intentional sex-positive community Hacienda Villa in New York City, which regularly hosts discussions, demonstrations, mixers, and sex-ed classes, I recently discovered this fact. Which is how I, along with a pack of other foxes with questions, found myself there.

The analysis of play-party protocol by relationship expert Effy Blue couldn't be more pertinent right now: In three days, the area where a diverse group of people and I now sat quietly would be filled with dozens of naked, writhing bodies, including my own. Blue covered everything a sex-party attendee needs to know in a lively two-hour presentation that included group exercises and participant interaction. Vietsub Sex Movies

This helped attendees be excellent, respectful guests and prepare themselves for a wonderful experience. And the fact that these lessons apply to everyone is what motivated me to impart what I had learned. Boundaries, intentions, and desires (BID) Blue advised using a tool called "BID," which stands for boundaries, intentions, and desires, before engaging in any kind of sex play. A boundary is something you don't want to do, such as anal play or having sex with a total stranger.

An intention is a state of mind that shapes the experience in accordance with one's values. As an illustration, say, "I'd like to approach this party with an open mind to trying new things." In this context, a desire is an experience you'd like to have but don't have any plans to have. It's a bonus rather than a goal. This could be a cuddle puddle, kinky scene, or a same-sex encounter.

She noted that "sex parties can be very stimulating environments." The best course of action is to plan ahead and make some resolutions before the party, especially if you're going with a partner. Sometimes, heightened emotions can affect your decision-making.

Always have a "go bag" with you Although condoms, lube, latex gloves, and other accessories are readily available at parties held at the Villa and elsewhere, Blue claimed that packing a "go bag" for an adventure where sex play may be planned will prepare you for a variety of unanticipated situations. You never know when you'll click with someone who is allergic to latex or run into someone whose penis would be much happier inside a bigger, snugger, or more textured condom.

Additionally, Blue advised always keeping lube on hand because it is an absolute necessity for all sex acts. To various people, safe sex can mean different things. "While some of us enjoy jay walking, others eagerly jump out of airplanes. The same is true of sex "According to Blue, anyone who engages in any kind of sex should consider the level of risk they are comfortable with.

She instructs potential party guests to be upfront about their safer-sex policies with play partners. She posed the rhetorical question, "Do you wear gloves when inserting fingers?" to us. "Do you engage in oral sex using dental dams or condoms? How recent must the results of a STI test be? Develop your language skills so you can tell others what you need to feel safer.

Don't be reluctant to observe Blue explained to us that watching is a form of participation. She counseled us to become at ease with showing off our (respectful) leer. She noted that sex parties are frequently the first time someone sees live sex that they are not involved in, saying, "We need watchers for the exhibitionists, so give yourself permission to watch." She cautioned us to be voyeuristic while being aware of our own energy and the energy of those around us. She advised not forcing your gaze on anyone who is obviously uncomfortable. Want more on XHUB.TV