Porn Isn't at Fault

 

A persistent myth has been spread through pop psychology and the Internet for several years. The myth asserts that men who watch online porn may have trouble maintaining their erections, especially when they try to engage in "real" Good Sex Movies. Additionally, the claims imply that because they have trouble getting arouse, they watch an increasing amount of "extreme" pornography.

For a number of years, sex therapists and researchers like myself have expressed concerns about this myth. The sole basis for this theory is the subjective anecdotal evidence. Men's self-reports of erectile dysfunction are, to be completely honest, about as reliable as other reports about their sexuality.

Blaming erectile dysfunction on pornography instead of masturbation TO pornography seems like a strange leap and ignores many significant aspects of behavior during masturbation, such as the fact that many men grip their penis more tightly during masturbation than is possible during intercourse. This phenomenon, referred to as "the death grip," is associated with sexual dysfunction but not erectile dysfunction.

The most frequent known correlation between high levels of masturbation and pornography is delayed ejaculation during intercourse, whether as a result of "the death grip" or merely training one's body to last longer. Scary tales about erectile dysfunction prey on the fear engendered by the stigma attached to erectile dysfunction. A man's erection "means something," according to very rigid, constrained ideas about masculinity, which imply that a man is more manly if he can get an erection than if he cannot.

These concepts place the erection at the center of male sexuality and masculinity. That is incredibly condescending, useless, and somewhat depressing. The fact that masturbation and intercourse are two very different experiences is important, but it is ignored when erectile dysfunction during intercourse is attributed to porn. One can and does focus entirely on oneself while masturbating. However, a good lover balances their own needs with those of their partner during sexual activity.

Partnered sexual activity can be extremely difficult for untrained, fearful people. In young men, anxiety is a well-established predictor of erectile dysfunction, according to research. Condoms are another important indicator of erectile dysfunction that is present during partnered sexual activity but absent during masturbation. It's a sad and unfortunate fact that using condoms makes many men more likely to experience erectile dysfunction and prevents them from using safer sex practices.

Few men use a condom while masturbating, despite the fact that this is a tactic I frequently suggest to help men become accustomed to the sensation of sexual stimulation while wearing a condom and to desensitize anxiety symptoms related to doing so. Finally, these erection-related myths may be iatrogenic in and of themselves. Erectile dysfunction is actually caused by one's thoughts and anxieties about getting an erection. In reality, men who feel more guilty about watching porn are more likely to report having trouble getting an erection during partner sex.

I've been making the case for years that blaming the Internet for erection issues is not only foolish, but also potentially harmful for the reasons listed above and more. However, anecdotes continue to circulate. In fact, it seems that the activism that supports these viewpoints might even have the opposite effect by causing more of these social psychology-related anecdotes. But finally, a study that put these anecdotes to a real scientific, quantifiable test was carried out.

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